Beyond Show, Don't Tell: The Real Secret of Emotional Storytelling

Show, don't tell' isn't always right. See how award-winning authors break this rule—and when you should too. 🖋️ #AmWriting

NOTE: This is a very long article and you may want to read it online rather than in an email.

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Writing guides often recycle the same advice. One in particular I come across is "Show, don't tell." Yet many beloved and bestselling books break this and many of the other supposed rules. The thing about writing is that what matters isn't following rigid guidelines, but creating stories that forge genuine emotional connections with readers.

Today, we'll explore how successful authors create deep emotional resonance, and why some traditional writing advice might be holding you back.

Here's what we'll cover:

• Why "show, don't tell" isn't always right

• How bestselling authors balance showing and telling

• Three proven approaches to emotional storytelling

• Common myths that might be weakening your writing

Breaking the "Show, Don't Tell" Myth

"Show, don't tell" might be the most repeated writing advice in history. But let's look at how Gabriel García Márquez opens "Love in the Time of Cholera":

"It was inevitable: the scent of bitter almonds always reminded him of the fate of unrequited love. Dr. Juvenal Urbino noticed it as soon as he entered the still darkened house where he had hurried on an urgent call to attend a case that for him had lost all urgency many years before."

Márquez directly tells us about the connection between almonds and unrequited love, then shows us the doctor entering the house. The combination creates immediate emotional resonance. Similarly, in "Mrs. Dalloway," Virginia Woolf freely mixes showing and telling:

"Mrs. Dalloway said she would buy the flowers herself. For Lucy had her work cut out for her. The doors would be taken off their hinges; Rumpelmayer's men were coming. And then, thought Clarissa Dalloway, what a morning — fresh as if issued to children on a beach."

These authors understand that sometimes, direct emotional statements create intimacy between reader and character. They're not afraid to tell when telling works best.

The Three Channels of Emotional Connection

Successful authors typically use three main approaches to create emotional impact, often combining them for maximum effect.

1. Direct Emotional Statements

Consider this passage from John Green's "The Fault in Our Stars":

"I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once."

Green doesn't try to show this through metaphor or action. He simply states it, and the directness makes it powerful. Similarly, Rainbow Rowell opens "Eleanor & Park" with raw emotional honesty:

"He'd stopped trying to bring her back. She only came back when she felt like it, in dreams and lies and broken-down deja vu."

2. Behavioral Expression

Donna Tartt masterfully shows emotion through action in "The Goldfinch":

"I looked at the picture for a long time, then set it face-down on the table. When I looked up, I was surprised to see tears running down my mother's face."

The character's careful handling of the photo and his surprise at his mother's tears tell us everything about the emotional weight of the moment without directly stating any feelings.

3. Contextual Resonance

In "The Road," Cormac McCarthy creates devastating emotional impact through context:

"Once there were brook trout in the streams in the mountains... On their backs were vermiculate patterns that were maps of the world in its becoming. Maps and mazes. Of a thing which could not be put back. Not be made right again."

He never directly states the loss and grief at the heart of his post-apocalyptic world. Instead, he lets this description of extinct fish carry the emotional weight.

The Balance of Showing and Telling

Great writers know when to show and when to tell. In "Pride and Prejudice," Jane Austen freely alternates between showing and telling:

Telling: "Elizabeth's spirits soon rising to playfulness again, she wanted Mr. Darcy to account for his having ever fallen in love with her."

Showing: "'How could you begin?' said she. 'I can comprehend your going on charmingly, when you had once made a beginning; but what could set you off in the first place?'"

The combination creates a richer emotional landscape than either technique alone could achieve.

Advanced Emotional Storytelling Techniques

Let's dive deep into specific methods master storytellers use to create unforgettable emotional moments. We'll break down passages from literature, examine their techniques, and provide practical frameworks you can apply to your own writing.

The Emotional Layering Framework

Great emotional scenes often work on multiple levels simultaneously. Consider this passage from Toni Morrison's "Beloved":

"She had not thought to ask him and it bothered her still that it might have been possible - that for twenty minutes, half an hour, say, she could have had the whole thing, every word she heard the preacher say at the funeral... and gotten through it without weeping."

Morrison layers several emotional techniques:

• Surface emotion (grief)

• Underlying emotion (regret about not asking)

• Physical manifestation (resistance to weeping)

• Time-based tension (specific timeframes mentioned)

Let's break down how to create this kind of layered emotional resonance:

1. Primary Emotion Start with your scene's core emotional beat. What's the main feeling you want to convey?

2. Secondary Emotions Add complementary or contrasting emotions that create depth. In Morrison's passage, the regret adds complexity to the grief.

3. Physical Expression Include subtle physical details that reinforce the emotional state.

4. Temporal Elements Consider how time impacts the emotion - memories, anticipation, or the weight of specific moments.

The Emotional Distance Technique

Kazuo Ishiguro masterfully controls emotional distance in "Remains of the Day." Study this passage:

"Indeed - why should I not admit it? - at that moment, my heart was breaking."

Notice how the dashes and formal language ("Indeed," "why should I not admit it?") create distance, making the final emotional admission more powerful. This technique works particularly well for:

• Reserved characters

• Emotionally charged moments

• Cultural or social constraints

• Unreliable narrators

Advanced Scene Construction

Here's a practical framework for building emotionally resonant scenes:

1. Emotional Setup Before any big emotional moment, establish:

• Context through environmental details

• Character baseline emotional state

• Stakes (what's to gain or lose)

• Reader expectations

Example from Ann Patchett's "Bel Canto": "Some of the guests, having finished their cake, asked for coffee. It was time for the show to begin, not that anyone was particularly anxious for it."

This seemingly simple setup creates tension through mundane details contrasted with anticipation.

2. Emotional Escalation Build intensity through:

• Increasing physical sensations

• Tightening focus

• Rhythm changes in prose

• Emotional contrasts

3. Emotional Release Pay special attention to the aftermath:

• Physical aftermath

• Emotional reverberations

• Changed relationships

• New understanding

AI Writing Assistant Prompts

Here are specific prompts you can use with AI writing assistants to enhance your emotional scenes:

Emotional Layering Prompts

For exploring complex emotions: